Facing My Worst Self in the Grocery Line

cow backside

Photo: Andrew Storms

Every few weeks, I drive to my local Sprouts store and buy a couple bags of organic Guatemalan coffee. They have a machine where you can grind the roasted beans on the spot, and the coffee is soooo good.

This particular Sprouts store is a rather, shall we say, relaxed establishment where long lines are part of the experience. Last Thursday at 5 p.m., three cashiers were open and the lines of people stretched all the way back to the produce department.

As I eyed the three lines to figure out which would move quickest, a man veered his cart decisively to the right so I defaulted to the center, nearly cutting off another woman. She slid her cart in close behind me, and I could feel her daggers.

The people waiting all wore similar expressions of resignation, like you might see in the faces of cows standing in a dank feed lot. I counted the people in my line: 11. Then I looked over at the speedy gentleman to the right and counted only ten people ahead of him. So unfair! I thought to myself. I was totally planning to get in that line until he cut me off.

 

cows in feed lot

Photo: Randy Heinitz

 

I stood with my two little bags of coffee and inwardly groaned at the overstuffed carts ahead of me. Who are you people, camp cooks? I wondered. Preppers stocking up for the apocalypse?

Our cashier appeared to be an affable young man who was now chatting with the customer at the front of the line. C’mon, enough with the talking!  I implored him with my strongest ESP vibes.  Scan and talk at the same time! Let’s mooooooooove!

 

cow trampoline

 

To my right, Mr. Speedy’s cashier had stopped scanning. “Price check on Register 8,” he announced. Oh YES. I brightened up considerably. Now Speedy’s line is slower than mine. Na, na, na, na, NA, na! 

Suddenly I had one of those out-of-body experiences where my better consciousness intervenes and slaps me upside the head. What are you thinking? it demanded. What’s with this ugly spirit of competitiveness? Why are you feeling glee because your fellow human is delayed?

 

cow and horse

 

Before I could answer those questions, I saw movement from the corner of my eye. A green-shirted Sprouts employee had appeared and was now fiddling around at the next cash register. He didn’t look at us as he carefully straightened the bags, meticulously sprayed the conveyor belt with cleaner, and counted every bill and coin in the cash drawer. And then…yes? No? Wait for it…

He flicked on the lane light and a mass exodus occurred. The dagger woman behind me was first in line. Dust rose in the air and the new line was ten people deep in 15 seconds. None of us patient, longsuffering cattle had been nimble enough to migrate. Even worse, our bagging clerk moved over to the new line. So unfair!

Dagger’s eyes met mine as she paid for her groceries. “Hasta la vista, sucker,” she seemed to say before waltzing out of the store.

 

bye felicia cow

 

I took a deep breath and tried to remember all the things I’ve read about acceptance and letting go. Inhale peace, exhale stress.

I pictured Jerry Seinfeld’s dad yelling, “Serenity now!” What is it about being in a crowded grocery store that brings out my most primitive instincts? My default mode seems to be:

  • I am in a hurry. Even if I’m not on any particular schedule, I’m still in a hurry.
  • Waiting is a big waste of my valuable time.
  • Lines should be fair and democratic!
  • Cashiers should be efficient and know all the grocery codes, even for starfruit and Swiss Chard.
  • Our bagger must never defect to another line!
  • When it’s my turn, I like it when the cashier is friendly.
  • Success = making better time than my fellow shoppers.

I took more deep breaths and sent up some lame, shallow prayers. After several more minutes of jockeying, it was finally my turn.

“Your coffee smells good,” the cashier said as he scanned.

“I love Sprouts coffee.”

“It’s the best.” He smiled and nodded at me. “You need to press the green ‘Enter’ button and click ‘Yes.'”

“Oh, sorry. All of these machines are different.”

“I know, right? Why can’t they standardize card readers?”

“Exactly!” I smiled and gazed back at the dozen people scowling in line behind me. I swear to you, I could hear words like “HURRY UP, LADY” and “MOVE IT!” floating around me.

 

angry cow

 

“You still need to sign the keypad.”

“Oh, sorry.”

As I left I noticed Mr. Speedy still in his line, peering at the card reader trying to figure out which button to push.

Cowabunga! I thought, as I skipped to my car like a happy heifer finally let out to pasture.

 

content cow

May your lines be short and your patience long in the days ahead.

Hugs,

The signature for Eliza Cross

P.S. For more bad behavior, you might also enjoy “Why Was I Speeding Up a Mountain Road?

 

For the Love of Good Quality

Krups coffeemaker

My coffee maker is 20 years old this week. I know this for a fact, because it was a wedding present two decades ago. I hope it doesn’t sound wrong to mention that the appliance has lasted twice as long as the marriage.

dented Krups coffee carafeBy my estimation, this Krups coffee maker has produced more than 24,000 cups of excellent coffee and it’s still going strong. I dropped and dented the stainless carafe when we moved, but it didn’t affect the performance so I kept using it.

Lasting quality is a thing to behold these days, isn’t it? When our computers need to be replaced every few years and we tear down buildings like football stadiums after just a few decades, it can begin to feel like old things don’t have much value.

Maybe it’s because I’m getting older, too, but I really appreciate owning something that is classic and durable.

I write a lot about saving money, but sometimes it makes sense to invest in craftsmanship and lasting quality.

Here are some things that come to mind:

  • Cast iron skillets
  • Handcrafted furniture
  • A hand-forged knife
  • Classic clothes
  • A KitchenAid mixer
  • Well-made tools
  • A Pendleton blanket
  • Cowboy boots

Another hallmark of a well-made product is great customer service from the maker. When the inner shell of my OtterBox phone case cracked, the company promptly sent me a free replacement. No questions asked. No warranty required. I didn’t have to package up the old case and return it. They simply trusted me.

Buy Me Once is a brilliant company that sells goods like appliances, kitchenware and clothing that are made to last. They don’t yet offer coffee makers, but that’s okay. When mine wears out, I’ll probably look for another Krups.

How About You?

What do you own that is exceptionally well-crafted and long lasting? Can you recommend any brands that offer top quality products and great customer service? I always love to hear your suggestions and thoughts.

Hugs,

The signature for Eliza Cross

Easy Blackberries and Cream Pinwheel Pastries Recipe

Blackberry pastry recipe

 

Berries cookbookThese pretty pastries, which are featured in my new cookbook Berries: Sweet and Savory Recipes, only look difficult to make. Flaky puff pastry pinwheels are anchored with a sweet, creamy filling and topped with blackberry jam, fresh berries, and a sprinkle of sparkling sugar.

They’re prepared from time-saving frozen puff pastry. You can easily thaw the pastry sheets by separating them and covering them with parchment or plastic wrap, and simply letting them sit out at room temperature for about half an hour. You want the pastry to be cold, but pliable.

Here’s the easy recipe:

Blackberry pastry

Blackberries ‘n’ Cream Pinwheels

  • 8 ounces cream cheese, softened
  • 1/3 cup sugar
  • 2 teaspoons freshly squeezed lemon juice
  • 1 teaspoon lemon zest
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
  • 1 (17.3-ounce) package frozen puff pastry (2 sheets), thawed
  • 1/2 cup blackberry jam
  • 1 1/2 cups fresh blackberries or boysenberries
  • 1 large egg
  • 1 tablespoon water
  • Sparkling sugar, for sprinkling

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F and line two baking sheets with parchment paper.

In a medium bowl, beat the cream cheese with an electric mixer on high speed until smooth. Add the sugar, lemon juice, lemon zest, and vanilla; beat until smooth then reserve.

On a lightly floured work surface, roll out each sheet of thawed puff pastry to a 10-inch square. Cut each square into 4 equal squares and transfer to the prepared baking sheets, leaving 2 inches between each square. Prick the pastry squares with a fork. Spoon 1 heaping tablespoon of the cream cheese mixture into the center of each square, spreading in a small circle about 1 1/2 inches in diameter. Spoon 1 tablespoon of the jam on top of the cream cheese mixture and top with 4 blackberries.

Use a sharp knife to make four diagonal cuts from the corners of each pastry square to within 1 inch of the center. Fold every other corner up over the filling to the center, overlapping the points and pinching to seal.

In a small bowl, whisk together the egg and water. Brush each pinwheel all over with the egg wash. Sprinkle the pastry with sparkling sugar. Bake until golden brown, 15 to 18 minutes. Cool on a wire rack for 5 to 10 minutes before serving. Makes 8 pastries.

Hugs,

The signature for Eliza Cross

Grateful thanks to photographer Stacey Cramp for shooting the beautiful pastry images, to Vanessa Seder for her lovely styling, and to publisher Gibbs Smith for permission to share the recipe. 

How to Attract Hummingbirds and Make Your Own Hummingbird Nectar

Hummingbird at feeder

Photo: S. Sompop

 

I always love hearing the thrilling, trilling sound of the first hummingbirds here in Colorado. According to Audubon, hummingbirds beat their strong, tiny wings 90 times per second. Their energetic metabolisms burn up calories fast, which is why they typically eat half of their weight in bugs and nectar every day and visit 1,000 to 2,000 flowers a day.

We hang a feeder in the shade garden, and if we’re quiet we can watch the hummers stop by for a drink throughout the summer. The stores  have commercial hummingbird nectar on the shelves right now, but a quick look at the ingredients list reveals that the mixture is mostly water and sugar enhanced with red dye #40 and chemical preservatives.

 

Hummingbird nectar

 

Instead, make your own hummingbird nectar. It’s easy and inexpensive, and all you need is water and refined sugar. According to Audubon, “Plain white table sugar is sucrose, which, when mixed with water, very closely mimics the chemical composition of natural nectar.”

I was tempted to make homemade nectar with a healthier ingredient than refined sugar — honey or raw sugar, for instance. But Audubon says NO — plain ole’ refined sugar is best since raw and organic sugars contain higher levels of iron that could be harmful to the birds, and honey can promote “dangerous fungal growth.” Goodness knows I always try to avoid that.

You don’t need to add red food coloring, either. Just use a brightly colored feeder to attract the hummers. Here’s how to make a batch of nectar, and you can increase the quantities depending on how much you need:

Hummingbird Nectar Recipe

1 cup water

1/4 cup refined white sugar

In a small saucepan over high heat, bring the water to a rolling boil. Add the sugar and cook, stirring, until sugar is completely dissolved. Remove from heat and cool to room temperature before filling feeder. Change nectar weekly.

 

Hummingbird

Photo: Monkeystyle3000

 

Flowers Hummingbirds Like

You can also attract hummingbirds to your garden or yard by planting nectar-rich flowers.

Look for blossoms in bright colors, which are more attractive to hummingbirds than light pastel hues. Tubular-shaped flowers tend to contain more nectar. Here are some varieties that are especially attractive to hummers:

Perennials:

  • Bee balms
  • Columbines
  • Coneflowers
  • Daylilies
  • Delphiniums
  • Lupines
  • Salvia

Biennials:

  • Foxgloves
  • Hollyhocks

Annuals:

  • Cleomes
  • Impatiens
  • Petunias
  • Zinnias

 

Hummingbird at feeder

 

How About You?

Does your garden attract hummingbirds? Do you have a feeder? Do you grow any special flowers in your garden that the hummers especially like?

If you want to take a deeper dive with hummingbird watching, check out Audubon’s Hummingbirds at Home website and app where you can sign up to share your own sightings and observations.

Hugs,

The signature for Eliza Cross

The Photos I Didn’t Post on Instagram This Week

Instagram Eliza Cross

 

I love looking at everyone’s pretty pictures on Instagram. When I scroll through the feed, it’s like a little vacation for my soul. And when I look back through the collection of images I’ve posted, it’s like viewing a scrapbook of memories and lovely sights.

Instagram isn’t a reflection of my real life, though — not by a long shot. If I were posting the bad and ugly along with the good, I’d have shared this image:

 

kitchen drain repair

Real life.

 

Last week we discovered that the drain line from our kitchen sink cracked at some unknown time, and had been slowly leaking water in the basement wall. Getting it repaired wasn’t pretty… or cheap.

We couldn’t use our kitchen sink for four days. So I didn’t make homemade pizza like I’d shared on this previous Instagram post:

 

homemade pizza

 

Instead, real life led to pizza delivery because the kitchen was torn up and the plumber was here working late on Saturday night.

 

pizza delivery

Real life.

 

I love taking pictures in the garden, and occasionally I see a sight like these lovely Forget-me-nots:

 

forget me not

 

But do not be fooled into thinking that this snapshot is an accurate representation of our garden, my friends.

If I’m being real, I need to share some photos of the bug infestation I’m currently dealing with.

 

Black Cherry Aphid

Real life.

 

I believe this is Cherry Blackfly, an aphid that sucks the sap from cherry tree leaves in the spring. Ladybugs eat the aphids, so maybe next year I’ll try introducing some of the lucky bugs to the emerging leaves early in the season.

Interestingly, the wasps in our garden have also been eating the aphids. I tend to think of wasps as pests, so I’m reminded that nature has its own self-sustaining balance. At this stage of the growing season, the only remedy is to cut off and discard the damage — and who doesn’t love snipping sticky leaves covered with thousands of black bugs?

This is our dear dog Maddie. She is 16 or 17 years old, and I love this recent photo showing her sweet face and glorious white whiskers.

 

Australian cattle dog mix

 

This spry senior is starting to have a lot of accidents, though. Our wonderful vet has been running tests and trying different drugs, hoping for a miracle cure. The grass around our patio is not looking pretty, but I don’t care because she’s doing her best to get outside quickly.

 

Real life.

 

I’m reminded that the things we post on social media are usually the prettiest sights and our best selves, and not a true representation of anyone’s reality.

Did you know that Instagram has some real-life hash tags. including #bummer, #expensiverepair, #aphids, and #uglylawn?

If you want a real treat, be sure to check out #olddogsrule.

Hugs,

The signature for Eliza Cross

Remembering the Puzzling Days of the Dandelion

bumblebee and dandelion

 

“In today’s history lesson, we’ll examine a very strange time in human history – the early 2000s.

During this troubling period, humans on the planet Earth had collectively decided that this flower was a scourge:

 

Dandelion flower

 

Taraxacum, more commonly known as dandelion, was a perennial, herbaceous plant that grew on Earth. It had long taproots that helped naturally aerate the soil. The entire plant was edible, and it had many medicinal purposes.

However, major chemical companies spent millions of dollars on advertising to convince consumers that dandelions were bad.

 

dandelions in a garden

 

During this same time period, many people grew large patches of non-native grass in their yards. Although the natural habit of plants on Earth was to diversify, the humans spent long hours removing dandelions and tending their large swaths of fescue grass.

Lawns were a lot of work. They weren’t practical or sustainable, but most people still had them because it was the norm.

A yard of bright green, weed-free grass was a status symbol at the time. Some lived in neighborhoods with HOAs that called dandelions “noxious weeds” and required their removal.

 

bee and dandelion

 

Water was becoming scarce. Droughts were increasing worldwide at a rapid pace, yet inexplicably the humans continued to use precious water on their large swaths of turf.

The humans rarely enjoyed or even stepped on their yards of grass.

 

perfect lawn

 

They maintained them mostly for show.

 

honey bee and dandelion

 

The media outlets of this era regularly reported the alarming facts that bee populations were dwindling rapidly. In 2017, Time magazine reported that 700 North American bee species were headed for extinction.

Dandelions were a natural pollinator that bees loved, but for some reason this did not stop the humans from trying to eradicate the yellow flowers from their turf patches.

 

dandelion bee

 

Water supplies were becoming increasingly polluted in the early 2000s.

Weed killers were big business. Humans purchased billions of dollars of toxic chemicals to eradicate the dandelions, clover, crabgrass and other plants that naturally sprouted up in their lawns. The chemicals seeped into the Earth’s surface water, groundwater and soil. Herbicide residue was found in many foods.

 

Ortho weed killer

weed killer

 

The weedkiller glyphosate was linked to cancer and other diseases in humans, but the chemical companies funded research studies that refuted the claims.

The chemical companies financed like-minded politicians through political action committees, and hired lobbyists to weaken and eliminate restrictions on toxic herbicides.

Despite the widespread adoption of the internet around the turn of the 2000 millennium, it was a period of great misinformation and the people had not yet figured out how to discern the truth.

While we may never fully understand the mistakes and motivations of the Earth people of the early 2000s, we can learn from their catastrophic errors in judgment and take better care of our planet Kepler-186f.

We must remember to always demand clean, independent scientific research. We must remember to vigorously keep dark money out of politics. We must always hold our elected officials accountable to preserving our planet’s resources.

Let the early 2000s always remind us that seemingly innocuous actions by a large number of people can result in terrible consequences.

Let history remind us to seek and revere the truth.

And let us never forget the dandelion.”

Dandelion

 

Lawn photo by Sir Mildred Pierce.

A Reader’s Decluttering Dilemma

Clutter

 

Occasionally you readers write and ask me for advice.

When you query me about topics like cooking, gardening, simple living, and Greek yogurt, I always feel a mixture of flattery and terror—honored to be asked, and scared to death I’ll steer you wrong.

Curiously, you never ask me for dating tips. What’s up with that?!

Anyhoo, a lovely reader named Leah wrote me about a common dilemma that can arise when trying to clear space and get organized. Here’s her letter:

Dear Wise Eliza,  (Please note: I may or may not have added the word “Wise”)

We need to declutter, and I am about to get rid of lots of things. For me, the difficulty isn’t in parting with the things (i.e., it’s not a question of sentimentality or nostalgia) – the issue is that I don’t know how to find all these things good homes without going to great lengths. Goodwill and other charity shops are great for some items, but I simply don’t know what to do with really nice things. I want the next “steward” to really love them – not keep them in storage (as I did) and then put them in landfill.

I can get rid of these things quick on Freecycle, but I’ve found that people don’t value objects or services unless they pay for them. eBay is a possibility but it involves a lot of time and hassle; yard sales are time-consuming and people generally are looking for deals (rather than things they love and need); and giving these things as gifts feels like I’m burdening my friends. Two strong, conflicting needs – to shift the stuff fast and be non-wasteful – are tough for me to reconcile, and I don’t know what to do.

What would you advise?? My husband tells me not to feel guilty or responsible for the existence of these things (especially the items that were given to me as gifts), but I find this so emotional and difficult!

Gratefully yours,

~Conscientious, but Crowded

 

Leah, have you considered keeping a hungry goat as a pet?

 

Pet goat

 

Sorry, I’m kidding—no pun intended.

Let me share a couple of thoughts, and then we’ll invite our astute readers to weigh in.

1. You might enjoy this post,How to Declutter Your Home,” by Maxwell Ryan. Ryan is the co-founder of Apartment Therapy, a wonderful site with inspiring photos and ideas to help people in smaller homes create beautiful, highly functioning spaces.

2. Consider selling your treasures on NextDoor.com, a site that connects people in nearby neighborhoods. It’s much less anonymous than, say, Craigslist. I’ve sold several items using the site’s free classified ads, and met some really nice people in the process.

3. Find a nonprofit that helps people transition from homelessness. A fine example here in Denver is Joshua Station, a former old Motel 6 converted into apartments refurbished by volunteers and decorated with donated goods. If you find a charitable organization where your wonderful treasures will directly be making a difference in another person’s life, you may feel more peace about letting them go.

4. Photograph your treasures before you say goodbye, and make a photo book through a service like Shutterfly. Write a few memories, so that you can remember and share your feelings about the items and what they meant to you.

How About You?

Readers, will you share your thoughts about how to mindfully declutter and let things go? I always love hearing your ideas, personal experiences—and dating tips.

Hugs,

The signature for Eliza Cross

P.S. Grateful thanks to Tomi Knuutila for the use of the collection image above and Rebecca Siegel for the use of her wonderful goat image.

Yummy Easy Homemade Meatballs

homemade meatballs

 

My favorite technique for preparing homemade meatballs also happens to be incredibly simple. These are my three tips for delicious meatballs that are browned on the outside and tender on the inside:

Secret #1: Most meatball recipes call for raw onion to be added to the mixture, but I prefer to saute the onion in butter first along with a little minced garlic. This pre-cooking step allows the onion and garlic to “melt” into the mixture as the meatballs cook, resulting in a pleasing caramelized flavor.

Secret #2: I like to use a blend of half Italian sausage and half ground beef. The Italian sausage adds a little zing (and admittedly, a little extra fat) to the ground beef, taking the meatballs from sodden to spectacular.

Secret #3:  Instead of laboriously trying to evenly brown the meatballs on all sides and dealing with spattering fat in a frying pan, I simply shape them and bake them in a hot oven. After just 20 minutes, they’re miraculously browned and perfectly cooked inside.

Shall we make some beautiful meatballs together?

To begin, melt 1 tablespoon of butter in a skillet over medium heat and cook 1/4 cup chopped onion just until it turns translucent. Add 1 clove minced garlic and continue cooking for about 90 seconds, until the mixture barely begins to brown. Remove from heat and reserve.

 

saute onion and garlic

 

Next, combine a half pound each of ground Italian sausage and ground beef, 1 piece of fresh bread processed into crumbs, an egg, a teaspoon of salt and 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper in a large bowl until well combined.

 

meatball mixture

 

(No matter how hard you try, it’s hard to make a bowl of meatball mixture look photogenic.)

Use a tablespoon to shape the mixture into meatballs.

 

 

Arrange on a foil-lined baking sheet.

 

 

Bake in a preheated 400 degree oven until browned and cooked through, about 20 minutes. Remove from the oven and cool. You can see how the onion becomes caramelized after cooking. Yum.

 

homemade meatball

 

At this point you can add the meatballs to a spaghetti sauce like I did in the photo at the top of this post, and serve over spaghetti.

Or, you can toast some buns, sprinkle with a little Parmesan cheese, and make meatball sandwiches.

 

meatball sandwich

 

You can also freeze the cooled meatballs, tightly wrapped, for up to 3 months. Here’s the complete recipe:

Mama Eliza’s Easy Baked Meatballs

1 tablespoon butter
1/4 cup finely chopped onion
1 large or 2 small cloves garlic
1/2 pound bulk Italian sausage
1/2 pound ground beef (I like ground chuck for this recipe)
1 piece of bread
1 egg
1 teaspoon sea salt
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F. Line a baking sheet with foil and lightly grease or spray with cooking spray.

Heat the butter in a small skillet over medium heat. When it melts, add the onion and cook until translucent, 3 to 5 minutes. Add the garlic and cook, stirring constantly, for 90 seconds. Remove from heat and cool for 5 minutes.

In a large bowl, mix together the sausage and ground beef. Pulse the bread in a food processor or blender to make crumbs and sprinkle over the meat mixture. Add the onion mixture, egg, salt, and pepper and combine until well blended.

Use a tablespoon to form the mixture into balls. Arrange on the prepared baking sheet and bake until the meatballs are lightly browned and cooked all the way through, about 20 minutes. Cool the baking sheet on a wire rack. Makes about 18 to 20 meatballs.

Enjoy!

The signature for Eliza Cross

For the Love of Classic Clothes

Classic clothing

Dear friends,

I own a silk blouse that I’ve been wearing and enjoying for 16 years. I don’t even remember where I got it, but the blouse fits perfectly and the cut is flattering. The sleeves are just the right length, and the collar is neither too narrow nor too wide. I hand-wash the blouse, and because it’s made of quality fabric it still looks like new.

In a world of cheap, throwaway goods, isn’t it a pleasure to own something that is classic, well made, and lasting?

For the past several years, I’ve been challenging myself to only acquire great clothes that I really love. No more buying a so-so shirt just because it’s on sale. Everything has to fit well and feel good. Gradually, my wardrobe has morphed into a smaller, but nicer collection.

Great clothes don’t need to be expensive. For Christmas the past few years I’ve asked for classic cashmere sweaters from the thrift store, and my family has happily obliged. I now have an assortment of soft, pretty sweaters that keep me warm and cozy all winter long.

A tailored black lightweight wool blazer I found at T.J. Maxx is perfect for business events, and it always looks right because it doesn’t have big shoulder pads or huge lapels — just traditional, time-tested styling.

Some other staples in my closet include jeans that fit well, black pants, a white cotton blouse, a black skirt, white jeans, fitted t-shirts, and a little black dress for parties. I wear a lot of black, so I have black boots, pumps, flats, and sandals as well. Simple.

According to Esquire magazine, some of the can’t-fail classic items for men include khaki pants, an oxford button-down shirt, a navy sport coat, a white dress shirt, a tailored suit, and a polo shirt.

True sustainability, for me, is wrapped up in craftsmanship and lasting quality. Accumulating fewer-but-better clothes frees up closet space and makes getting dressed in the morning a pleasure.

How About You?

What clothing item in your closet has stood the test of time? What wardrobe favorites do you return to again and again?

What men’s and women’s clothing classics would you add to my lists above?

I’d love to hear your ideas and thoughts.

Hugs,

The signature for Eliza Cross